Slow As Molasses

What I've learned from my other blog is that when I feel like writing about something that is important to me and only me, but seems rather trivial to the rest of the entire world, write about it anyways.  Over the last almost 3 years we've lived in Indonesia and I've blogged each step of the way.  I've blogged through loneliness, sickness, trips to Bali, Lombock and around Jakarta, visits to slums, walks around our own Lippo Village; I've written about sports days, lazy days, sad days, cooking classes that have taken place in my kitchen, English lessons taught in a cemetary, birthdays celebrated, reunions with friends and family, struggles with the language, rodents and lizards in and around our house, a friend and I finding (and eating) "rodent" poop next to my fridge (I still laugh when I think of how shocked my kids were when I popped a "poop" into my mouth...), hot days, incredibly loud and sometimes dangerous thunderstorms...and the list goes on.  When I go over the posts I am amazed at how much I have already forgotten, and how it's wonderful to have the memories stored somewhere other than my own mind.  Thankfully they are stored somewhere other than my own mind or they'd be lost forever!!!  And so today...

As I wander along this path of "getting to know Celiac disease," I am surprised regularly by how little I know about how my body will respond, and when I think I've got it figured out, things change.  Last weekend I was in Singapore talking to a doctor, who I admit made me feel less anxious by her knowledge of how to treat my symptoms.  After I returned home on Monday night, I kept busy throughout the week.  Nothing felt different and I don't think I did anything different.  By Friday night, I had to cancel a games night with friends because of a variety of symptoms including lethargy and fever.  I slept on and off until Saturday, 1 pm, between getting up to make breakfast and to wander the house.  I NEVER stay in bed until the afternoon so I have no idea what that was about.  Today is Tuesday and I'm still lethargic, even after eating regularly and taking my vitamins.  Now I need to figure out what's going on but there's just nothing to put my finger on, except I was too busy last week.  One thing I think I need to remind myself is that celiac is not an allergy, it's an autoimmune disease, and quite possibly I've been fighting off something for days.  I guess time will tell, but right now I'm off to pilates to see if I can't conjure up some energy by stretching and twisting and most likely sweating a little.

Thanks for reading.

Canadian Spring found in Singapore

Finally. A doctor with some answers.  I'm not sure how much Celiac knowledge she has, but at this point it's the symptoms that I'm interested in improving, and I like having answers.  Last week a friend and I went to see an "Age Management" doctor, one who specializes in, well, aging.  Something we're all doing but some of us need more help than others. We bought our plane tickets online, packed our bags (a medium one for 5 days...very proud of myself on that one), and flew to Singapore.  Thankfully, my friend has a friend who was heading to Australia, and her house was free for us to use.  This wasn't just any old house; we shared what is equivalent to a five-star hotel room, complete with a marshmallow bed.  I was thinking that it's a really good thing that depression isn't an issue for me, because once I got into that incredibly comfortable bed I may never have wanted to leave.  We even had cable tv.  With all the channels.

 After fasting breakfast the day after our arrival, I had a blood test, and then later had a bone density test and a few other things done.  There came a point in our morning when, after weighing in and finding out I'd lost 2 more kilos, hunger starting to poke at my stomach, and being downtown without access to cook my own gluten-free, dairy-free meal, I lost it.  My friend J took me to a coffee shop to try and get some breakfast in me, and upon reading the menu and realizing that there was nothing there for me to eat, I broke into tears.  Not loud ones, just big ones.  Racing each other down my face.Graciously, J hauled me out of the shop and we went to a grocery store, where I bought 2 slices of turkey for $5 (get OUT of here!), a plum, carrot juice, and a can of beans. We sat in McDonald's and proceeded to eat my very strange breakfast with people watching me, blatantly staring at the obvious bag lady who couldn't even afford McDonald's and had to eat out of a can instead.

That was the only negative part of the trip.  Results said mostly what I thought they would, with the little twist that I am low in cholesterol.  Bummer that I can't go to Burger King and remedy that with a weekly splurge of burger, fries and a chocolate topped vanilla cone.  Guess I'm deep frying everything at home, and gravy on all my red meat!  I also found out that I am halfway between average bone density and osteoporosis (osteoporetic??) and so calcium, vitamin D and lots of intentional bone-building exercises are in my future.  My big news, very exciting, is that two weeks after the Celiac diagnosis (yet completely unrelated),  I was told I had polyps in my body and would have to have them removed.  I told God that I don't have the faith to ask Him to take away the Celiac just yet (although if others want to stand in that gap, I'm willing!) but would He mind getting rid of the polyps, please?  I wasn't really ready to take that on.  I believe He honoured that prayer and even if they "disappeared on their own," I still give the glory to Him.

Lots of good things happened while in Singapore, and I enjoyed my time away.  My friend J had to leave Saturday morning while I stayed on to talk results with the doctor on Monday, and so I had 2 more nights on my own.  During those days I had some great visits with a few different ladies I hadn't known before, and was very thankful that they were part of my weekend.  On the day I was to return home, I donned my back pack, slipped on my Naots (Birkenstock-like sandals) and headed to Orchard road for my results.  After talking to the doctor I had a few hours to kill, and so I had a snack on a bench for about 30 minutes, just watching people walk by.  In that time, not ONCE did I see any other person dressed even remotely like me.  Definitely no ladies wearing backpacks, that's for sure, and the only pair of Birkenstocks I saw had diamonds glued to them, I'm sure of it!  Funny, because if I was in British Columbia, Canada, no one would look twice at the Granola sitting on the bench.

Now I'm home again, and it's like a burden has been lifted from my shoulders.  I have those things I thought I might (decreasing bone density, need to eat more protein/carbs/fat, more vitamins, specific exercises), yet it's the knowing, having things confirmed by a medical doctor that makes it seem like it's not such a big deal, that I can do this.  So, 1/4 of the way into 2011, and I'm feeling like a Canadian spring is happening in my life.   The snow is melting and little shoots of new life are coming up out of the hard ground.  I'll be tilling that ground for a while, probably adding some 'manure of life' now and then, but the results to come are worth it.

Thanks for reading.

Purple Poppy Seed Cake

Citrus is one of my favourite kitchen smells and so I was thrilled when I was able to recreate an old lemon loaf favourite, given to me years ago by my old friend Chris P.  I altered my old recipe, added ideas from recipes on line, and ended up with a very moist, uniquely purple, Lemon Poppy Seed cake.  Although it may seem odd to eat purple cake, the poppy seeds and lemon bits look rather pretty floating together.  One thing that I would change from what I originally did, and that is to NOT add any glaze.  The purple sweet potato flour seems to retain a lot of moisture and adding a sugar-lemon mix to the top just made the cake too gooey.  I may try this recipe again with banana flour instead of purple flour and see if the glaze works better.  My kitchen is pretty much like a laboratory right now, and for every success (or semi-success) 2 or 3 things end up in the garbage.  This cake actually smelled good while baking...not a common thing in this house right now.  I think the difference is that I made a rice flour mix altering a flour recipe from http://glutenfreegirl.com/recipes/ rather than using a store-bought mixture*.

Gluten-Free/Dairy Free Lemon Poppy Seed Cake
1/2 cup hazelnut or almond milk
6 tbsp vegetable oil
1 cup white sugar
2 medium eggs

1 1/2 cups flour mix*
1 tsp baking powder
1/2 tsp xanthan gum or guar gum
1/4 tsp salt

2 1/2 tbsp poppy seeds
zest of 1 x-large lemon
juice of 1 lemon (fresh)

Turn oven on to 350 degrees (or no. 4 mark on gas dial).  Mix first 4 ingredients well with electric mixer.  Sift flour mix*, baking powder, gum, and salt together 3 times to 'fluff' dry ingredients.  Add to liquid mixture, then add poppy seeds and lemon zest/juice and stir all with wooden spoon until dry is just mixed into wet.
Pour into a greased & floured 10" round cake pan, bake 40 minutes or until toothpick inserted into the middle of the cake comes out clean (do not undercook or again, it goes gooey). 
Cool then glaze (optional).

Glaze
1/3 cup white sugar
juice from one lemon
Mix together with a spoon until sugar dissolves.

*Rice flour mix:  1 cup brown rice flour, 1 cup white rice flour, 2/3 cup purple sweet potato flour (I substituted for potato starch) and 1/3 cup tapioca starch.

Enjoy!

Thanks for reading

Doctor Intervention

After 3 months of living with Celiac Disease, I have finally found a doctor who is willing to take me on.  Originally I had found one here in Indonesia, about 30 minutes away(or 2 hours, depending on traffic), and I was excited because not only was he recommended by someone I feel is trustworthy, but he can also read German.  All of my diagnosis were made in Germany and are therefore ALL written in German, including the bills.  Apparently, however, Sprue and I have scared him off, because after one visit and some emails back and forth, he has not responded further to any correspondance I send.  Hmmm. 

No worries, though.  I have connected, through a good friend, with a doctor in Singapore, and she seems more than willing to discuss this disease with me, and hopefully guide me in the right direction.  I admit I get discouraged by people who tell me that someone they know was feeling better within a few months of their diagnosis.  Some blogs I read make it sound like it was an overnight turnaround for them.  That's not the way it is for me and I'm curious to find out why.

I find out today, hopefully, when I am to go.  My hope is that it'll be within the week, and that I'll find out even more about how to live with Celiac-Sprue.  What I know so far is that I eat with extreme caution, I eat mostly at home, I stay away from all dairy when I feel at all poor (although I've been able to eat chocolate on a good day lately), if I exercise hard one day I need to expect to be worn out the next, and that I need to give myself a break and realize that I will be frustrated and even grumpy now and then.  That's what bugs me the most...I feel borderline irritated all the time and I'm not sure how to change that, except to continue to keep my mind focused on God's word and promises rather than my own imagination.

Today is a hot day, I've already had an opportunity to practice a little tennis with a friend, and now it's time to head to Jakarta to get my very-dead Mac notebook fixed.  I'm also on my way to get my eyes checked, because my experience here has, again, been very frustrating and I just want to have glasses that I can see out of.  Sometimes I think that if there's one thing that will cause me to head home, it's the medical system here, because it seems that with everything that goes on here, that's what irritates me to the core.

Thanks for reading.

4 hours later:  what may be even more frustrating than the medical system is living in a society where one (namely, me) has to depend on another person (namely, our driver) to tote me around Jakarta anytime i want to go somewhere outside of our village.  Some might think it a luxury, and I admit, not having to park is truly a luxury, but now my driver is sick, I stayed at home and will have to find another convenient day to head to my appointments (why a driver?  There are many stories that scare a foreign women into not driving alone in the city of Jakarta...).  Ultimately, why am I complaining??  I ended up resting 'for a moment' and slept 1 1/2 hours of my morning away.  I think Haris being sick was actually a blessing in disguise as my body is trying to tell me something.  I think I need to listen...

Bean Salad with Quinoa

I've never been a breakfast person, and it's interesting to watch my daughter become the splitting food-image of her mom as she chooses left-over spaghetti or fried leftover potatoes and a hamburger patty for breakfast.  Now that oatmeal, most cereals, french toast, and waffles (too much work to clean out the waffle iron after wheat pancakes) are not an option, I'm eating dinner for breakfast more often.  The one food combination that really seems to hit home and get me through the first few hours of my day is quinoa alongside bean salad.  I have to admit, when I was a little girl my mom would make bean salad for buffet meals and I was always so grossed out by the brown bits swimming in onion rounds.  I mean, who would eat beans voluntarily, and especially with ONIONS?  What always surprised me is that she'd bring an empty bowl home.  Adults.

Well, now that I've grown up, I'd like to share my own colourful, energy-giving recipe.  One friend gave me her version of this recipe (calls it a dip, and scoops it up with tortilla chips) and said that her brother makes it ahead of time and takes it, drained of oil and vinegar, out on camping/climbing trips.  Apparently his keeps for days.  All bean & veggie measurements are approximate, and if you like one item more than the other, definitely increase it.

Bean Salad (can use canned beans or fresh-then-boiled beans)

ingredients:
1 cup fresh, chopped (1 inch) green beans
1 can red kidney beans, drained and rinsed
1 can garbanzo beans (chick peas), drained and rinsed
1 can sweet corn kernels, drained
1 small red onion, thinly sliced (I chop the slices in half, too)
1 medium red bell pepper, seeded and diced
1 fat handful of thickly diced cilantro leaves--you'll want to season to your personal taste with this one

Steam green beans until almost cooked (they'll continue to soften in the liquid), remove from heat, let cool slightly.  Add the rest of the beans and veggies.

marinade:
1/2 cup white sugar
1/2 cup apple cider vinegar
1/4 cup white vinegar (OR...3/4 cups apple cider vinegar if you want a sweeter salad)
1/2 cup vegetable oil
1 tsp salt
1/2 tsp pepper
1 tbsp water

Mix all ingredients in a small saucepan, bringing to boil until sugar and salt have dissolved.  Cool for a few minutes and then pour over mixed beans and veggies.  Let it sit for a few hours, or even better, overnight.  The same friend suggested draining off the liquid after 3 hours.  I tried it and agree that it tastes just as good after being soaked for at least 3 hours, without the extra moisture.

Prepare your quinoa like it says on the bag/box, but stir in a bit of gluten-free (dairy free) chicken stock powder to the water before adding to the grain.

The bean salad lasts for days, but only prepare enough quinoa for 2 days as it tends to 'grow' or sprout over time, and it dries out after the second day.  I eat the salad and quinoa side by side, but others I've served it to have mixed it all up together.

Thanks for reading.

Absolutely...Magnificent!

Of all the weeks since this new year has started, this last one has been the worst.  I'm not sure why, but now I'm definitely cutting out all dairy, including butter, to see if that helps.  I've already cut out ice cream, cheese, whipped cream, sour cream (all the fun ones), etc but kept butter and dark chocolate as "food improvers."  Those are out of the picture now too, and I'm hoping that's only for a while.

Last Saturday my husband came home from the gym and had done something to put his back out.  With him having had back surgeries in 2003, we both realize how important it is to lay low with back pain.  We ended up just hanging out at home all weekend, which was a bit of a bummer for me because I'd been in the house a lot the week prior, editing and feeling a bit 'off.'  We'd planned on driving around the area and checking out some stores together that he rarely gets to see...more my thrill than his.  The 'off' feeling grew, and came to a head on Tuesday night.  My helper had tried a new fish dish, fried dorry pieces glazed with a sweet mayonnaise sauce, and i don't know if it was the food or the ingredients, but I ended up spending time with my head in a bucket later that evening.  Not intending to gross anyone out, I'll spare details.  I would like to share that I had gone with Tris earlier to get a massage (what good wife wouldn't go and get a $9 1 1/2 hour massage in support of her husband??)  and as usual I left the establishment showered but with oil-slicked hair (they love to use the oil!!).

I know that I looked bad, because Wednesday morning when our driver arrived, I slipped on appropriate clothes (modesty is the rule here, always) and headed out to tell him what I needed him to do that day.  The look on his face was priceless, because as I stepped outside his head popped up and his eyes got so wide that I could barely see his forehead.  "You sick, Mrs????"

What is really funny with this whole scenario is that I had slipped on a new t-shirt for bed on Tuesday night, one that I had bought as '$3 shopping therapy.'  After my bout with the bucket and my greasy massage, I looked absolutely...Absolutely.  I looked in the bathroom mirror at my glassy eyes, grey pallor, greasy hair stuck everywhere, and just below my head, on my t-shirt, read:  "gor.geous (gor'-jes) adj. 1. The quality of being Brilliant, MAGNIFICENT 2. Attractive, Beautiful, Dazzling, Lovely. 3. all of the above, all the time, everyday.

Needless to say, I headed immediately to bed for some beauty rest!

Thanks for reading.